Monday, January 23, 2006

Crap - It Appears I have Been Tagged

Which means that I am subjected to the torture of the equivalent of a 21st Century chain letter. Since Erin O'Brien gave me absolutely no direction with regard to the rules of being tagged, I feel no obligation to pass them along to those lucky ones that I choose to "tag."

Why should you have it easier than I do? I mean, after all, I am here busting my ass to make this whole thing happen with little or no guidance...

Moving on to the main event!

My Five Weird Habits:

1. When I walk into an elevator I have to put my finger through the key ring and close the circle with my thumb so that I cannot drop my keys down that little gap that goes into the elevator shaft. This has never happened to me before and as far as I can remember, it has never happened to anyone that I know. But for some reason I have an irrational fear of dropping my keys into the elevator shaft. Thus I have developed this habit of putting my finger through the ring.

2. I hate being touched by strangers (or even acquaintences). Other than shaking hands and very informal contact, I do what I can to avoid touching people. This is why I hate being in the middle seat on an airplane. I am a relatively large person and I spend the entire flight bunched up so my shoulders, arms, hands and legs are always several inches away from the person next to me.

3. I constantly look in the refrigerator...fully knowing that the same stuff that was there an hour ago is still there now. I just want to look at it.

4. I can channel surf using my tv remote control even after I fall asleep in a chair. Is this a habit or just mad remote control skills? You be the judge.

5. I have become an obsessed blogger. I check the messages with Pavlovian regularity, my drooling response constantly triggered by the prospect of having a message from you...whoever you are.

Now apparently it seems that I need to give up 5 more of you unlucky bastards.

I pick:




Jesus Toast

Nowhere GUY


Blogger Eve provided this enlightening comment...

uhhh Mingo, sweetie, that one may take a bit. He's not obsessed like our sick asses. When he gets back in town, i'll pass your link along sweets.

10:58 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger Captain Carl provided this enlightening comment...

ARRR......pinky T'be Ok ta taggin someone twice no posted the rules

11:02 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 provided this enlightening comment...

I know...but I fulfilled my obligation.

You may have guessed my heart is not in the meme/tag things.

Captain Carl, I went back and corrected my tagging faux pas.

Now go screw yourself you seaweed soaked little shit.

11:07 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger Captain Carl provided this enlightening comment...

Aye...the Capt was havin a hard time too......

Fer the record I have already pleasured my peg leg four times today....and im workin on the fifth while thinkin of ye

11:18 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger garrett provided this enlightening comment...

Regarding Item #2, don't forget, you are misshapen. Or, excuse me, intentionally oblong.

11:29 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger jungle jane provided this enlightening comment...

Flamingo you should have done what i did and outsourced the tagging to your mates.

my best mate came back to me in less than an hour with a list of 5 things she found weird about me. while she was doing that i drank beer and picked my nose.

surely you thought of doing that? i thought you were a lawyer...

12:07 AM, January 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous provided this enlightening comment...

I have dropped my keys down elevator shafts thrice. Twice in one week even. Work keys. Once with a, it wasn't around my neck. I just wish it had been.

12:43 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger Erin O'Brien provided this enlightening comment...

If I were to tell you that I fondle every single pear in the grocery, would you break out into hives?

2:12 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 provided this enlightening comment...

Captain Carl I love you man!

Garrett, I should have included misshapen. But, like the whole remote control thing, is being misshapen a habit or is it merely a condition achieved after much effort and honing.

jungle jane, instead I worked on my five habits while I outsourced my nose picking to my friends. You can pick your nose, you can pick your friends but can you pick your friend's nose? I think I answered that last night and it was a resounding yes.

Sausage dammit I knew that could really happen. You don't realize what you have just done. My irrational fear has just grown to magnificent proportions because you have just confirmed that it is not irrational. I was considering the lanyard but apparently that isn't fail-safe either. I may need to get one of those retractable key chains to wear on my belt - you know the ones - the kind the lesbian ladies love to wear. Very practical and sensible like their shoes.

Erin...purrrrrrrr. Fondle away while I lay back in the fruit cocktail of my fantasy. Wait, that didn't sound right.

7:26 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger PDD provided this enlightening comment...

That sounded perfect. If you were gay we'd (both sexes) still come around and sexually harrass you.

This morning on the subway, A woman spralled out her legs two seats over and smothered her dirty filthy shoes on my glamorous black coat sleeve. I looked at her as if to say, do you mind? Her feet were still resting on my arm. I pulled back to get her stinkin feet off me to brush off the filth. She didn't look at me once. Not a sorry, nothing. She probably voted NDP.

I completely understand 1, 3, & 5. I think you are a little obsessive and take #2 a little too far. I have no judgment for #4, as I really have no idea what to say for that one.

7:52 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 provided this enlightening comment...

I have to admit that I can be obsessive sometimes. It is usually something weird.

Hang on, I need to go look in the fridge....


If someone I didn't know would have put their feet on my arm in public, it would have made me nuts. Keep out of my personal space!!!!

7:55 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger PDD provided this enlightening comment...

I don't want to always have to come here and say that something is waiting...

8:03 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger Bloodgood provided this enlightening comment...

Im Flamingo's Cousin and a member of the PFMC PDX Chapter. Nice to meet you all.

Flamingo-the PDX chapter is 2 strong right now and recruiting

8:50 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 provided this enlightening comment...

Bloodgood, you are one bad ass Pink Flamingo!

Did you forget to count the other guy? You know, the guy that took the ride to PDX with me?

9:42 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger Bloodgood provided this enlightening comment...

I thought he was part of the AZ Chapter, I have recruited a guy that lives here in PDX he has the same scooter I do and we go on rides together

When is #2 gonna have his Blog up and goin

9:54 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger crallspace provided this enlightening comment...

I'm not into those tag games, but I obsessively blog and check the fridge over and over.

10:22 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger The Phoenix provided this enlightening comment...

A woman lost her Razor phone down the elevator shaft. That was an expensive mistake.

10:43 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger drunkbh provided this enlightening comment...

The remote control thing is definatly some mad skills. Ohh...I hate being touched by strangers too. I've seen how many people don't wash their hands in restrooms. I don't feel like having someone else's shit on me.

11:06 AM, January 24, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous provided this enlightening comment...

What does the Pacific Fish Management Council have to do with tagging? It makes sense that there is a chapter in PDX but there are no salmon in AZ...hmm.

It's actually quite easy to retrieve things from elevator shafts, filthy, but easy. Just like me.

11:33 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 provided this enlightening comment...

Bloodgood - that is awesome. Did you give him a shirt? I want to see a picture of the two of you on your "bikes" with the shirts on.

Crall - I had seen this tagging stuff going on before and I feared the day that it would actually impact my life. I participated in this one because (a) I was too busy to write about anything else (b) I found a great "tag" picture to post, (c) it seemed quick and harmless and (d)Erin tagged me and I love Erin.

You will not see me do the top 100 things about me on my 100th post.

You will not likely see me participate in another tag.

Phoenix, dammit, now how am I going to keep a death grip on both my keys and my phone. This is getting unbearable. I may stop riding elevators.

Drunkbh - I'm not even so concerned about germs. I just have this zone of personal space around me that I do not like invaded. I don't like close-talkers, I don't like huggers (unless I know them very well) and I don't like people that have a complete lack of sense for personal space that encroach into mine without consideration (like PDDs subway experience).

This is my space, that is your space. Respect it unless we are going to have sex. By the way, when are we going to have sex?

11:38 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger PDD provided this enlightening comment...

Oh, you see pinky, questions like that just get me started...

7:29 AM, January 25, 2006  
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